POOR MR. BOEHNER

POOR MR. BOEHNER

John Boehner is near tears, not because he's worried about his reelection as his seat was bought and paid for years ago and is locked up in his safe. What he is fretting about is being Speaker again. If he found it a thankless job last time, woe to the fellow who bangs the gavel in 2013. Little doubt it'll be a Republican as current projections give them 237 seats to the Dem's 195. What scares him is that the GOP caucus will follow Nancy Reagan's advice again and “Just Say No!”

With Democrats in control in the Senate and Obama back in the White House, it's that “deja vu all over again” thing all over again. But with the Tea Party's tea having grown cold and the 2014 mid-terms just around the corner, Boehner knows two more years of obstruction will cost them the House and give the Democrats two years to pave Hillary's way back home to 1600 Pen. Ave.

What John's trying to figure out is how Republicans can cooperate with Obama without looking like wusses. If he's half smart he will hit on the slogan, ”Country First!” And maybe he can talk one of the Tea Party mouthpieces into shouting, “No representation without taxation!” (Fat chance!) But there is another way his caucus can keep the evil Grover Norquist from having a stroke: Don't vote.

Can you hear him announcing the vote to raise taxes of billionaires? “Ayes, one ninety eight, Nays, two. Not voting, two thirty five.”

There is another thought that keeps popping up in Mr. B's head at night. Let Eric Cantor get his hand on the gavel he's long dreamed of, and then he and fifty or sixty other Republicans can go back to their old jobs as plumbers, roofers, and pimps (i.e lobbyists) come the mid-term election and old Johnny B can keep his seat.

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